Loving-Kindness Meditation
Ten minutes of simple wishes: for a friend, for yourself, for someone you hardly know, and for everyone.
Level 5 · Heart
Loving-kindness
10 min · A friend, yourself, everyone
Wish people well, you included. After a week or two you could try level 6, Open. Levels are only a suggestion.
Not therapy. Open your eyes, move, or stop if you feel panicky, numb or flooded. With trauma or PTSD, practise with a professional. SourcesTerms
Your session
How this works: Method, 10 sources, Checked against 1 worked example,
How this works
Method
Every session is a script we wrote, following the order of the MBSR and MBCT courses (settling and the breath first, then the body, noting, kindness and open awareness). The voice is Kokoro, an open speech model, rendered once into a single audio file per session with its bells and pauses; each sentence is checked by a speech recogniser and a quality score before it is kept. Minutes are counted from what actually played, and stay in your browser.
Sources
- Zeng et al., The effect of loving-kindness meditation on positive emotions: a meta-analytic review, Frontiers in Psychology (2015)
- NCCIH, Meditation and Mindfulness: Effectiveness and Safety
- Kokoro-82M, an open speech model (Apache-2.0) (v1.0)
- Goyal et al., Meditation programs for psychological stress and well-being: a systematic review and meta-analysis, JAMA Internal Medicine (2014)
- Galante et al., Mindfulness-based programmes for mental health promotion in adults in nonclinical settings, PLOS Medicine (2021)
- Basso et al., Brief, daily meditation enhances attention, memory, mood, and emotional regulation in non-experienced meditators, Behavioural Brain Research (2019)
- Rusch et al., The effect of mindfulness meditation on sleep quality: a meta-analysis of randomized controlled trials, Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences (2019)
- Farias et al., Adverse events in meditation practices and meditation-based therapies: a systematic review, Acta Psychiatrica Scandinavica (2020)
- Britton et al., Defining and measuring meditation-related adverse effects in mindfulness-based programs, Clinical Psychological Science (2021)
- Kabat-Zinn, An outpatient program in behavioral medicine for chronic pain patients based on the practice of mindfulness meditation, General Hospital Psychiatry (1982)
How it’s tested
One worked example for this page is checked by automated tests before every release: given the inputs, the tool must show the expected answer.
Limits
Not therapy. Open your eyes, move, or stop if you feel panicky, numb or flooded. With trauma or PTSD, practise with a professional.
Changes
- First version: six levels from 3 to 20 minutes, a sleep body scan that fades out, a bells-only timer, two voices, six scenes and offline listening.
What the 10 minutes are like
You picture someone it is easy to feel kindly towards and silently wish them four things: to be safe, healthy, happy and to live with ease. Then you turn the same wishes to yourself, to someone you don’t know well, to someone difficult if you like, and finally to everyone.
Of its 10:00, about 4 minutes 1 second is the voice speaking and the rest is quiet. The longest quiet stretch is 47 seconds, starting at 2:31.
The session, minute by minute
Each line the voice says, when it starts, and how long the quiet after it lasts (in the Nicole voice).
| At | You hear | Then quiet for |
|---|---|---|
| 0:06 | Hello. | 3 s |
| 0:28 | You don't have to feel warm or loving for this to work. | 3 s |
| 0:49 | Sit comfortably, and close your eyes, or let them rest low. | 4 s |
| 0:59 | Take a few easy breaths. | 8 s |
| 1:17 | Start with someone it's easy to feel kindly towards. | 6 s |
| 1:41 | Silently, offer them these wishes. | 3 s |
| 1:54 | May you be safe. | 5 s |
| 2:01 | May you be healthy. | 5 s |
| 2:07 | May you be happy. | 5 s |
| 2:14 | May you live with ease. | 8 s |
Show all 25 rowsShow fewer
| 2:23 | Stay with that person for a few breaths, and repeat the wishes at your own pace. | 47 s |
| 3:18 | Now turn the same wishes towards yourself. | 4 s |
| 3:37 | May I be safe. | 5 s |
| 3:44 | May I be healthy. | 5 s |
| 3:50 | May I be happy. | 5 s |
| 3:57 | May I live with ease. | 8 s |
| 4:06 | If those words don't fit, change them. | 47 s |
| 5:10 | Now think of someone you don't know well. | 4 s |
| 5:33 | May you be safe. | 47 s |
| 6:32 | If you'd like to, think of someone you find difficult. | 5 s |
| 7:00 | May you be safe. | 47 s |
| 7:58 | Finally, let the wishes spread out to everyone. | 4 s |
| 8:20 | May everyone be safe. | 47 s |
| 9:20 | Let the words go now. | 8 s |
| 9:36 | When you hear the bell, open your eyes. | 20 s |
Read every word of the scriptThe script
Hello. This is a loving-kindness practice. We'll repeat a few simple wishes, first for someone we like, then for ourselves, and then for other people.
You don't have to feel warm or loving for this to work. The practice is in the wishing. Feelings may come later, or they may not. Either is fine.
Sit comfortably, and close your eyes, or let them rest low.
Take a few easy breaths. If it helps, rest a hand on your chest, or on your belly.
Start with someone it's easy to feel kindly towards. A friend, a grandparent, a teacher, or even a pet. Picture them, or just think of their name.
Silently, offer them these wishes. I'll say them slowly, and you can repeat them in your mind.
May you be safe.
May you be healthy.
May you be happy.
May you live with ease.
Stay with that person for a few breaths, and repeat the wishes at your own pace.
Now turn the same wishes towards yourself. For many people, this is the hardest part. If it feels awkward or strange, that's normal.
May I be safe.
May I be healthy.
May I be happy.
May I live with ease.
If those words don't fit, change them. May I be kind to myself. May I accept myself as I am. Use whatever words feel true.
Now think of someone you don't know well. A neighbour, someone who works in a shop you go to, or someone you saw today. They have their own worries and hopes, just like you.
May you be safe. May you be healthy. May you be happy. May you live with ease.
If you'd like to, think of someone you find difficult. Not the hardest person in your life. Someone mildly irritating is plenty. If this doesn't feel right today, stay with the friend from earlier.
May you be safe. May you be healthy. May you be happy. May you live with ease.
Finally, let the wishes spread out to everyone. The people in this building. In this town. In this country. And all over the world.
May everyone be safe. May everyone be healthy. May everyone be happy. May everyone live with ease.
Let the words go now. Just sit for a few breaths, and notice how you feel.
When you hear the bell, open your eyes.
The four wishes
May you be safe. May you be healthy. May you be happy. May you live with ease. They are simple on purpose, so you can say them to anyone, and you can change the words to ones that feel true to you.
The session starts with a friend rather than with yourself, because for many people wishing themselves well is the hardest part. Starting with someone easy warms things up first. The difficult person is optional; if it doesn’t feel right today, stay with the friend.
What the research says
A review of 24 studies with 1,759 people found that loving-kindness practice increased everyday positive emotions by a medium amount compared with waiting lists. Practices aimed at loving-kindness did better in those studies than ones aimed at compassion.
That is a modest, real effect, not a transformation. Like the other levels, it works best as a short habit.
When it feels fake
Saying kind words you don’t feel can seem forced, especially towards yourself. That is normal and doesn’t mean you are doing it wrong. The practice is in the wishing. Warm feelings may come later, or they may not, and either is fine.
If the practice brings up sadness or grief, that happens too. You can slow down, rest a hand on your chest, or stop and come back another day.
If it doesn’t feel right
Meditation isn’t therapy, and it isn’t for every moment. If you feel panicky, numb or flooded, open your eyes, move, look around the room and name a few things you see, or stop. You can rest your attention on your hands, your feet or the sounds around you instead of the breath, and closing your eyes is always optional. With trauma or PTSD, practise with a professional. The US National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health says not to use meditation to replace care from a health professional.
If you are in crisis or thinking about suicide, talk to someone now: in the US call or text 988, in the UK and Ireland call Samaritans on 116 123, and elsewhere findahelpline.com lists free, confidential lines.
More guided meditations
Sources
Frequently Asked Questions
What does metta mean?
Metta is a Pali word usually translated as loving-kindness or friendliness. The practice comes from Buddhist tradition; this version is secular.
Do I have to include someone I find difficult?
No. The session suggests someone mildly irritating, not the hardest person in your life, and says you can stay with the friend instead.
Can I change the phrases?
Yes. Use whatever words feel true, such as “May I be kind to myself” or “May you be free from pain”.